This weekend is some sort of life-cycle whirlwind roller coaster.
Wedding (not ours!) Saturday.
K’s first Father’s Day Sunday.
Death, love, life. All in three short days.
This is the second funeral I’ve been to while pregnant, which makes me sad. It was for my cousin’s childhood friend, who had just turned 38 a few days before he passed, which makes me even sadder. He died suddenly and shockingly, and I won’t fully go into the politics of everything but basically he probably would not have died if he (a self-employed businessman) had decent, affordable healthcare. As someone who HASN’T had decent, affordable healthcare more often than having it, that makes me even MORE sad. I know the terror of what lurks in an uninsured hospital visit bill, and I know how it makes you think you should wait and wait and see if you feel better and I wish there wasn’t the option for waiting and waiting, I wish everyone had equal opportunity to get to the hospital, to be taken care of, to be able to afford it, and to know that that was the best decision for the situation. Everyone doesn’t, though, and while I have the $20k in past hospital bills to show for it, at least I still have my life.
It doesn’t matter so much that I hadn’t talked to B in years, because I essentially grew up with B & my cousin E, though I was 7 years younger than either of them, and 7 years more annoying than either of them, and I tried tagging along on their mid-teen escapades with that particular adolescent insouciance that comes along with being 8 or 9 or 10. I knew him, and I knew he was a good person and a good friend, and he’s gone and I absolutely cannot imagine what his parents, step-parents, brothers, cousins, aunts, uncles, and closer friends might feel. May he rest in peace.
The wedding was for a more recent friend, of a few years, who got married to her best friend. They are an absolutely adorable, beautiful, wonderful couple, who are both so different and so much the same at once. I haven’t seen her in a while, since she and her husband (!) moved to California a while ago, but it was so great to catch up with her and some other friends I haven’t seen in a very long while. It was a quick and lovely, heartfelt ceremony, followed by great food, drink, and dessert. No pomp, no circumstance, just love. The day was just so perfectly “them.”
And tomorrow is K’s first Father’s Day, though he might not feel like a father yet, because he hasn’t changed a poopy diaper or woken up to the sound of Evie crying, or done a load of itty bitty baby girl clothes, or comforted a fussy teething baby. Yet. All in due time, K! But he will, and he will be great at it, so we will celebrate now, because I said so!
And there is other stuff, there is always other stuff, but I Must Get Work Done on a commissioned portrait, also because I said so!
But all in all, it is a weekend of celebration. Throughout all the sadness of B’s funeral, it was still a celebration of his life and the kind of person he was, which was, to be succinct, “great.” The wedding was a celebration of love and laughter and friendship and art. Tomorrow will be a celebration of life we’ve created and have yet to mess up with our bumbling, human ways.
There’s a lot of love in this weekend.